Rez Rebel Page 11

  “You okay, Floyd?” Charlie asked, suddenly picking up on my mood.

  “Yeah, I’m good. It was great, right?”

  The guys went back to rehashing everything. But I had to go home. I knew that my dad would be waiting for me. Staying at Jasper’s house was just putting off the inevitable.

  “Guys, I’ve gotta go,” I announced.

  “What? You can’t leave. We’re celebrating!” Charlie said.

  He propped himself up on one elbow and stared at me.

  “I know. But I have to go home. I need to talk to my dad.”

  * * *

  When I got near our house, I could see my father sitting in his chair through the front window. I stopped and watched him.

  His shoulders were slumped. He looked miserable. And I was the cause of it.

  I briefly thought about going through the back. Maybe I could climb through my bedroom window and avoid talking to him. But I had stood up to Kevin Feldman for everyone else. I had to stand up to my dad for myself. I couldn’t hide. I was the hereditary chief. And a chief wouldn’t run away. I squared my shoulders and walked up the front stairs.

  “Hi, Dad.”

  He didn’t move. He didn’t even look up.

  “I know you’re upset. But we should talk,” I told him.

  Nothing. Not even a twitch.

  “Dad! You have to talk to me!”

  That got his attention. He looked up at me slowly. I hadn’t noticed the drink in his hand until he put it down on the side table, ice cubes clinking. He stood and stepped forward until he was looking down at me. My dad had never been that aggressive with me before. But I stood my ground.

  “You humiliated me,” he said.

  “I know. I’m sorry for that,” I told him.

  “Kevin Feldman is going somewhere else to shoot his movie.”

  “Well . . . good.”

  My dad stopped. “What?” he asked. The smell of booze was coming out of his pores.

  I refused to take a step back. “We don’t need him, Dad.

  He just wanted to use us. He would have destroyed our land.

  We need real help here, Dad.”

  “I was going to get that! With the money he brought in. The media would have been all over this.”

  “What media? TMZ? Feldman makes terrible movies to try to get back his minute of fame. He’s a joke, Dad. A punchline. It’s the wrong kind of attention.”

  “I was doing what needed to be done.”

  “No you weren’t,” I argued. “You were doing what you thought needed to be done. But you weren’t listening to

  anyone else!”

  “I was listening to the Council!” he yelled.

  “No, Dad. You weren’t. Because they walked out of the meeting with everyone else and thanked us. I said what everyone else was thinking but were too afraid to say.”

  “And just what made you think anyone wanted to say that?” he asked.

  “All the people high fiving me after! Someone needed to say it, Dad. Someone had to tell Feldman that we aren’t here to be scenery for his stupid movie.”

  “Humpfff,” was my dad’s only answer. He sat down and picked up his drink again.

  “It just should have been you who said it to him.” I turned and walked away without another word.

  Dear Journal,

  When I was younger, my father sent me on a vision quest. It’s not something that’s done much anymore. But since he is hereditary chief, and I will be after him, my dad thought I deserved to at least try. I went out in the woods and I fasted and sang songs and made offerings.

  I didn’t see a thing.

  I spent three days out there and finally gave up. I was starving and exhausted and had bug bites all over. So I made my way back toward home, wondering if I should make something up to tell my father. I was hereditary chief! I should have encountered some kind of spirit animal or something!

  I was just about to step out of the forest and onto the road when I saw a bear. It was standing in the river about ten feet from me. I stopped dead. His strong, musky scent washed over me and I watched as he reached into the river and pulled out a fish. He was about to take a bite when he looked up and noticed me watching him. He sniffed the air and snuffled at me, staring.

  I didn’t dare move. I just stood and watched him as he took a couple of lumbering steps toward me. He stopped again, right in front of me. He could have reached out his massive clawed paw and swiped at me, spilling my blood all over the ground.

  But he didn’t.

  He made a low sound in his throat. It wasn’t a growl.

  It sounded more like a greeting.

  Stupid, I know.

  He stared at me a moment longer. Then he dropped his fish at my feet and turned away. He disappeared into the forest behind me.

  My father asked me when I got home if I’d had a vision.

  I told him I hadn’t.

  He nodded and said that not many people do. He told me not to worry about it. Maybe I could try again in

  a year.

  I never told my dad about the bear. It seemed like my moment somehow, like it would take something away to share it with him.

  So I walked into the kitchen without a word and handed my mother the fish.

  Chapter 25

  Downhill

  I noticed three things over the next few days.

  First, that my father was drinking more. He had never been much of a drinker. He had seen what drinking did to a family. His dad had left residential school with a raging drug and alcohol habit. My dad refused to be like his father, he said. He didn’t want to be an alcoholic who killed himself during an alcohol-fueled night with a gun he had given his grandson as a gift. I had been cured of any

  interest in drinking that night. But I guess my father hadn’t.

  Second, nothing had changed. Kevin Feldman had left the rez with his tail tucked between his legs. But none of our problems were being solved. My dad didn’t even seem to have anything in the works. His grand plan to bring Hollywood to the rez had blown up in his face — due in no small part to me. And he didn’t have a backup plan. He had taken no steps to get any funding, bring in support, or create programs for us. Nothing.

  And third, he was depressed. He was skipping Council meetings. He was sleeping late and spending most of his day sitting in front of the TV, flipping between talk shows and the shopping channel. I wasn’t convinced he was even showering. I was getting worried about him, so I mentioned it to my mom. She said he was just stressed out and he’d be fine. I didn’t

  want to think my mom was lying to me, but I wasn’t as sure as she was.

  And I had noticed a fourth thing.

  I was falling in love with Kaya.

  The more time I spent with her, the more I liked her. And the more time I spent without her, the more I realized how much I wanted to be around her. All the time. She made me feel good. She made it feel like none of this other stuff was happening. She made me feel normal again. I felt like I had before I found Aaron’s body.

  I was sitting in Kaya’s backyard on one of the old rusted swings. I’d idly push myself with the toe of one sneaker and occasionally swing sideways into Kaya who was on the matching swing.

  “Stop that.” She mock-frowned and leaned in to kiss me on the cheek. I loved when she did that. I was about to go for a real kiss when she stood up.

  “Everything okay?” I asked her. She was frowning but for real this time. But she still looked beautiful and I was thinking about just standing up and grabbing her for that kiss.

  “Not really,” she said. “I don’t know.”

  “What is it?”

  She sighed. Even that was cute. I was definitely a goner. Focus, Floyd.

  “It’s Mouse.”

  Suddenly she had my full attention. “Is he okay?” I
asked.

  “I don’t know. He hasn’t been himself lately, you know? You know he’s had trouble with the kids at school and he’s starting to stress out about going back. The closer we get to school starting, the worse he is. Some of the kids here have been giving him a hard time, too. They make fun of him for being so small.”

  “Yeah. I know. They always have. But the guys and I always had his back. Except . . .” I looked away guiltily. “Well, I’ve been hanging out with you most of the time lately.”

  “Yeah, I know. I think he feels like we’ve all forgotten him or something,” Kaya said, looking sad. “He’s been kind of quiet and withdrawn.”

  “Mouse has been quiet?” Mouse almost never stopped talking.

  “Yeah. He has. I’m worried about him. He’s been spending a lot of time in his room. And he’s never really done that before.

  He usually likes to be wherever the rest of the family is.”

  I didn’t know what to think. I felt terrible. Since I had started dating Kaya, I hadn’t had much time for anything other than her. I hadn’t even taken Mouse out fishing for Rodney again.

  “Okay. I’ll talk to him,” I told her.

  “You will?”

  “Of course. Just as soon as I get a chance. Maybe I can take him out fishing or something.”

  “Thank you!” She threw her arms around my neck and kissed me. I would have talked to Mouse without Kaya being so grateful. But this was definitely an added bonus. I kissed her back, brushing a strand of hair off her face and tucking it behind her ear.

  There was more kissing after that.

  A lot more.

  I fully intended to talk to Mouse later that day. I did.

  But then Kaya and I spent half the day wrapped around each other. And then the guys came over to talk about an outing that was being planned at the lake for the next day. Then Kaya’s parents came out with a jug of lemonade and some of Raynetta’s homemade banana bread.

  Eventually I left to help my mom make dinner, walking down the road and whistling. It had been a good day and I was looking forward to hanging out at the lake the next day with

  my friends.

  I got home and swung up the stairs. I was opening the door and walking in before I remembered that I hadn’t talked to Mouse.

  And I hadn’t seen him all day either.

  * * *

  If I was writing a story about a perfect day at the lake, this is exactly what I would have written. The sun was shining off the water. We had dragged down coolers full of drinks, sandwiches, and snacks and were eating, chatting in groups, or throwing around Frisbees and footballs. Sunscreen-covered girls were flirting, reading magazines, and splashing around at the edge of the water in shorts and bikini tops.

  Kaya and I were cuddled up on a blanket, talking about things we wanted to do with the rest of the summer. It was starting to sink in that she’d be going back to school soon. I’d be entering my senior year of high school, drowning in homework. I wanted to make sure we made the most out of the time we had left.

  Charlie had finally convinced Amber to go out with him.

  It was going well, if you could judge by the way he seemed to be sucking her face off.

  It was another perfect day.

  “Floyd, we’re playing touch football in the water. Wanna play?” Jasper asked, running past with Ben and a few other guys.

  “Go.” Kaya shoved my shoulder.

  “You sure?”

  “Yeah. I want to catch up with Amber. I’m dying to know what she sees in Charlie.” She grinned.

  “Hey!” Charlie splashed her with his bottled water.

  “Kidding!” she laughed. “Just go, you guys. I need some girl time.”

  “All right. Be back in a little while, okay?” I kissed her, tasting her strawberry lip gloss and spearmint toothpaste. She winked at me and turned to Amber, who was sending Charlie off with

  a smack on the ass. Sweet.

  I was running down to the water when I caught a glimpse of Mouse. He was sitting by himself on the outskirts of the party. His arms were wrapped around his knees. He was staring down at the sand and the hole he was digging with one foot. I skidded to a stop.

  I tossed the ball to Charlie and told him, “Be down in a

  second,” nodding toward Mouse.

  Charlie caught the ball and threw it to Jasper, who fumbled. “All right. Hurry up or I’ll be stuck on a team with butterfingers over there.”

  I walked over to where Mouse was sitting. He didn’t seem to be aware of anything or anyone around him. “Mouse?”

  I said softly.

  He glanced up at me. “Hi, Floyd.” He looked back down at his feet.

  I crouched down beside him. “You okay, buddy?”

  “Yeah. Just watching.”

  “Your sister is over there. If you wanted to say hi or something.”

  “Nah.”

  “Okay. Ummm. I was thinking we should go out fishing again soon. Look for Rodney.”

  That got his interest. He looked up. “Really? When?”

  he asked.

  “Floyd! Are you coming?” Ben hollered.

  I nodded and held up a finger. “In a minute,” I called back.

  I turned to Mouse again, who was still waiting for an answer. “Right. Fishing. Ummm. I’m not sure. I’ll have to find some time. Maybe next week?”

  I regretted those words the second they left my mouth. Mouse’s face clouded again. “Sure,” he said, his eyes dropping back down to the sand.

  “Floyd!” Jasper had joined Ben. “Come on!”

  “Coming!” I stood up and looked down at Mouse, feeling that I had failed somehow. “So, Mouse? We’ll find some time soon, all right?”

  He nodded without looking up.

  “Okay then. I’ll talk to you later.”

  He didn’t even acknowledge me. I felt uneasy but I didn’t know what else to do.

  “Come on, Floyd. Be on my team,” Charlie shouted. “We’ll take these losers DOWN!” He did a little dance and I couldn’t help but laugh.

  “All right, all right!” I ran down to join my friends. Even as I joined the game I knew that I should have stayed behind with Mouse. But ten minutes later, we had forgotten that we were playing “touch” football and were tackling each other into the water.

  Ten minutes later I had also forgotten about Mouse sitting all alone on the beach.

  Chapter26

  Searching

  The theme to Star Wars woke me up out of a dead sleep.

  I reached for my phone and knocked it to the floor. I grabbed at it. Once. Twice. I finally got a couple of fingers on it and picked it up. I squinted at the screen. 1:30? Who’d be calling at 1:30? Kaya’s face was flashing on the screen. Why would Kaya be calling me at 1:30?

  “Kaya?”

  She was sobbing on the other end. “Floyd?” That was the only word I could make out.

  “Kaya? What’s wrong?”

  “Floyd, Mouse is gone.”

  “What? Where is he?” I was sitting up now.

  “I don’t know. He’s gone. I couldn’t sleep. I was worried about him. I realized I hadn’t seen him all night so I went to talk to him. I thought he might still be awake. But he wasn’t there. His bed was still made. I looked all over the house for him.

  I looked outside. He’s gone, Floyd.” She was crying hard again.

  “Did you tell your parents?” I stood up and looked for a t-shirt.

  “Yes. They’re out looking for him.”

  “Okay. That’s good.”

  “He left his sketchbook open on his bed.”

  “So?”

  “You have to see it,” she said.

  I pulled on a pair of jeans and crouched down, peering under the bed for my sneakers. “I’m on my way over, okay?”

  �
��Okay. But, Floyd?”

  “Yeah?”

  “One of my dad’s guns is missing. Mouse must have

  taken it.”

  I felt like someone had forced a hand inside my chest and was squeezing my heart. I sat down hard on the bed, thinking of Mouse and then of Aaron. Aaron had taken off with a gun in the middle of the night. I had gotten a call and had gone looking for him too.

  I couldn’t stand the thought of finding Mouse like I had found Aaron. I felt sick just thinking about it.

  “Okay,” I said to Kaya. “It’ll be okay. I’m going to wake my parents and get the guys. We’ll all look for him, all right?”

  “Okay. All right.” She took a deep breath. “Floyd, what he drew . . . I’m scared he’ll do something . . .” she trailed off.

  “I know. I’ll find him. I’ll be there soon.”

  I hung up and went into my parent’s room. I walked past my dad’s side of the bed and shook my mother awake.

  “Floyd? What’s wrong? Are you sick?” she asked sleepily.

  “No. But I need you to get up. And get Dad up too. Mouse is missing. And he took one of John’s guns.”

  My mother was up and out of bed before I had even finished the sentence. She grabbed some clothes and shook my father.

  “Go, Floyd,” she urged me. “We’ll meet you there.”

  “Okay.”

  I was dialing my cell before I even closed the door behind me. “Charlie? It’s me. Is Jasper staying with you? Get him up. Meet me at Mouse’s right now. He’s missing.” I was about to hang up and then continued. “And, Charlie? He has a gun.”

  Charlie hung up without a word. I knew he was already

  waking Jasper.

  I ran to Mouse’s house. The entire place was lit

  up and Kaya was sitting on the front porch. She jumped up and threw herself at me, pressing her tear-soaked face against my chest. She was stabbing me in the neck with what I assumed was Mouse’s sketchbook. I hugged her close but pulled away quickly.

  I needed to get out and look for Mouse.

  She held the book out to me. “Look,” she said simply.